If you’v taken a second to stop touching yourself to thoughts of seein DISTRICT 9 this weekend, you may have noticed that there’s another movie opening Friday called THE GOODS:…
Bryan Singer is in talks to bring a big screen version of Battlestar Galactica to theaters. Originally he was set to develop the television series reboot in 2001 but was c-blocked by the Taliban. The gig later went to Ron Moore and the rest is history. No word yet on the creative direction of the feature but let's hope it wraps up a little tighter than the new series did. I find it kind of odd that Universal is already rebooting a franchise that practically just completed its successful run. If this is the new norm, can we get a do-over on Transformers 2? (Hit Fix)Check out these morning links before they get remade…The Goods character posters are good. (Cinematical)Poltergeist remake actually coming to theaters. (/Film)New Dexter promo artwork. (Dread Central)Check out a clip of Timothy Olyphant in Lawman. (Cinema Blend)Facebook gets Ed Helms in over his head. (Latino Review)
LEGION Red-Band Trailer – Watch more MOVIE TRAILERSThe new red-band trailer for LEGION hit the nets today and it looks like a winner so far. Paul Bettany stars as a loose-cannon version of Michael the Archangel, who comes down to Earth against God's wishes in order to ensure the savior of humanity currently incubating in his mother's womb survives an onslaught of evil demons. Phew. It's like the Catholic church rewrote the script for TERMINATOR 2 and managed to keep the badassitude. If only the Bible had calculating-ass, glock-wielding angels and demon grandmas dropping F-bombs before tearing off people's faces, maybe I would have stayed Catholic. Maybe after Monopoly, Candyland and Battleship, a studio can give the Bible a much needed cinematic update (with a cameo from Brendan Fraser and music by Kid Rock, of course.)Here are your decidedly most unholy links of the day: Ashley Smith Appears To Not Own A Bathing Suit (Gorillamask)How To Get A Bartender's Attention (Holytaco)Neverending Story Van Lady Vs. Filmdrunkards (Filmdrunk)25 Funny Misspelled Tattoos (Manofest)Duck Hunter Minus The Classic Game Console (Walyou)The Worst Book To Film Adaptations Ever (Pajiba)23 Movie Plots That Could've Been Solved In Minutes (Cracked)Town Hall Internal Memos (Maxim)Jude Law's Baby Mama Photo Album (Celebjihad)The Cost In US Dollars To Fall In Love (Mademan)Brock Lesnar Ruins Bud Light (Cagepotato)When Video Game Characters Turn To Acting (Unreality)How To Properly Torture An Alien (Asylum)Amanda Is America's Hottest Community College Student (Bustedcoverage)The 15 Ugliest Soccer Players In The World (Uncoached)Rally Car Drivers Vs. Lake (Regretfulmorning)Zipline Tree Collision Prevents Man From Reproducing (Nothingtoxic)New Ninja Assassin Photos (Filmofilia)
Blindfolds, bickering, shackles, mounds of snow, and serious daddy issues. All things you might find in Pamela Anderson's bedroom. Your TV preview begins now!CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMPNOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN AND PACIFIC!!!
Peer pressure in high school can be a real bitch, so kudos to Megan Fox for devoting a few minutes of her time to talk about what can be done to combat it. Granted, the only peer pressure she probably ever had to endure in high school was Michael Bay's casting car wash, but Fox gives a no-holds-barred, uncensored and sure-fire approach for all the ladies out there who have to cope with the lascivious behavior of teenage boys… and if there's one thing we learned about Fox during our coverage of JENNIFER'S BODY at Comic-Con, it's that she's best when uncensored. Enjoy. And try not to get killed and eaten when school starts back up, guys.
Director: Todd Graff Cast: Vanessa Hudgens, Alyson Michalka, Gaelan Connell, Lisa Kudrow Synopsis: A new kid in town assembles a fledgling rock band — together, they achieve their dreams and compete against the best in the biggest event of the year, a battle of the bands. Genre: Alyson Michalka Release Date: August 14, 2009
Julia Child has been dead for five years, but this past weekend the PBS star was resurrected. Her biopic, JULIE & JULIA, took second place at the box office, a feat that is even more impressive when you consider the filmmakers watered down the interesting tale of Child’s life with the inane exploits of some shitty blogger (pot, kettle, black). The fact that Hollywood was able to turn a PBS star who looks like a tranny version of Herman Munster into box office gold is sure to get noticed, and if there’s one thing Hollywood likes to do, it’s run an idea into the ground. Since it’s only a matter of time before some desperate studio green lights a similar film, we here at Screen Junkies have compiled a list of the top five PBS personalities who deserve a movie. All we’re asking for in return is a producer credit and 10% of the domestic gross (and 20% of the international).
The world's greatest zombie comic book is shuffling its way toward a small screen adaptation. The ridiculously rad Frank Darabont is in final talks to write and direct The Walking Dead for AMC. If you're unfamiliar with the books, the story centers on a group of strangers who must fight for survival in a zombie-infested world. Though the focus is on how we deal with one another once society and the creature comforts crumble, there is quite a bit of disturbing gore throughout. This is super exciting and Darabont is the perfect choice to helm. I'm also very excited that zombies will finally be brought to the small screen. The zombies on The Hills don't count because those are fast zombies. (/Film)Sink your teeth into these fleshy morning links…Studios line up for Kick-Ass. (Latino Review)LEGO is the latest toy-to-movie adaptation. What's next, Yo-yo? (Reuters)Astro Boy full length trailer. (First Showing)Miley Cyrus pole-dances. (Newsday)Jon Hamm interview. (AV Club)
This was the hit of Comic-Con 2009, and for good reason. There's nothing to say other than this is the only leaked footage of IRON MAN 2 that we've been able to find online. Oh, and people seated in large groups will eagerly clap at any use of the f-word. Enjoy, and don't say we never embedded anything for you. When you're done watching Don Cheadle/War Machine kick ass, check out these links: Jennifer Copeland In Little To No Clothes (Gorillamask) What Her Drink Really Says About Her (Holytaco) There's a Kick Ass Bidding War For Matthew Vaughan's Kick Ass (Filmdrunk) 10 Greatest Cleavage Moments In TV History (Manofest) Light Emitting Wallpaper Is Purty (Walyou) 5 Bad Movies With Great Ensemble Casts (Pajiba) 5 Incredibly Impractical Sexual Practices (Cracked) Grandpa Is A Mac (Sickpigs) How To Date Out Of Your League (Coedmagazine) Miley And Noah Cyrus Pole Dance, Make People Feel Awkward (Celebjihad) How To Be A Millionaire Rock Star (Mademan) 10 Most Cursed MMA Events Of All Time (Cagepotato) 15 Classy Video Game Covers (Unreality) What Is The Manliest Drink Of All Manly Drinks? (Asylum) Streaker Arrested For Running Through Airport (Bustedcoverage) Whatever Happened To The Cast Of Just One Of The Guys? (Uncoached) This Sh*t Just Got Real, Really (Regretfulmorning) Happy Birthday, Carolyn Murphy (Moondogsports) The Thrilling Conclusion To Sara's Class Reunion (Maninthebox)
Quentin Tarantino's Inglourious Basterds. You have to think the movie would make Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen-amounts of money if every moviegoer were Jewish and an action movie aficionado. While we at Screen Junkies are decidedly action movie lovers, we are also mostly of the gentile persuasion. So, while we already have our Basterds tickets for opening weekend, we fully appreciate how gratifying the film might be all the more gratifying for someone whose family had to actually endure the atrocities of the Nazis. The idea of hearing a Jewish perspective on a movie that centers on Jews brutally killing a bunch of people who brutally killed Jews always had an interesting ring to it. Luckily for us, our friends at Heeb Magazine read our minds, and passed writer Oliver Noble's review of the flick on to us for a gander. As you can see from the beginning of Noble's piece, Tarantino seems to have nailed his key demo:
Whale extinction, stem cell research, sustainability, and Nicolas Cage. Tonight's TV Preview are all causes once championed by Jerry Bruckheimer. CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN AND PACIFIC!!!
In SPREAD, opening this Friday, Ashton Kutcher plays Nikki, a high-end lothario who has slept his way into a life of privilege. We haven't seen the film, but we're pretty sure that we'd rather it focused on Kutcher's co-star Margarita Levieva, if only to give us more screen time with her. In the film, Levieva plays Heather, who turns out to be a grifter just like Nikki… and the plot thickens. But it got us thinking that Heather, no matter how good she is at swindling through sex, has got some pretty stiff competition cinematically speaking. The following ten sexpots are Screen Junkies' picks for the 10 Hottest Female Grifters in Movies. Angelina Jolie as Julie Russell ORIGINAL SIN (2001)
1980's nostalgia continues to boom as Paul Reubens has announced that he'll be dusting off the red bow-tie. The LA Times reports that Pee-wee Herman will perform onstage in Hollywood this November for a limited engagement at the Music Box @ Fonda. Perhaps if this run is successful it will lead to the big screen productions Reubens has been trying to get off the ground for the last nine years. The actor stated, "I've put part of him away for a long time but part of him has always been here with me. I think it will be like riding a bike — which is not a bad analogy for Pee-wee, by the way." Although his humor is off the beaten track, I'm glad that Reubens decided to pound the pavement and put this show together. His laziness was beginning to rub me the wrong way. On an unrelated note, I wonder if he listens to The Strokes?Check out these big adventurous morning links…Exclusive interview with District 9 director Neill Blomkamp. (Latino Review) Wolverine Goes To Japan. (First Showing)Design a poster for Triangle. (Empire)Courtney Cox will say anything. (Dread Central)Kathryn Bigelow gets some action in Brazil. (Cinematical)Tara Reid back on the sauce. (Cinema Blend)
MYSTERY TEAM Haunted Hotel Short – Watch more Funny Videos DERRICK COMEDY's new film MYSTERY TEAM opens nationwide in October, here's a new mini adventure to hold you over right now. If you like to laugh at naive youngsters being put in awkward, potentially life-shattering situations (like we do), then you'll love "The Case of the Haunted Hotel," which debuted online today. It's got alcoholic dads, political scandals, sex with minors, hush money and a floor made entirely of lava. What more could you want? Laughs? Fine. Take them. Coinciding with the release of the short is the announcement of early screenings of the film in select cities, the schedule for which you can get after the jump. Before you do, be sure to check out these mystery links: Shonda Lee Is Quite Hot (Gorillamask) If State Flags Were Honest (Holytaco) Joaquin Phoenix Is Still Acting Crazy (Filmdrunk) The Funniest Newspaper Headlines Of All Time (Manofest) Star Wars Golf Club Covers For Geeky Golfers (Walyou) Harmony Korine Makes Yet Another Really Weird Movie (Pajiba) The 5 Circles Of Baffling Web Comic Hell (Cracked) Kid Solves Rubik's Cube And Plays Guitar Hero On Expert (Coedmagazine) Billy Mays' Legacy Tainted By Cocaine Use (Celebjihad) How To Be A Real American Hero (Mademan) Fedor Disses Brock Lesnar And More! (Cagepotato) Classic Clips From Every Movie John Hughes Directed (Unreality) Which Dystopian Film Is Most Likely To Come True? (Asylum) Michigan QB Moonlights As A Coke Dealer (Bustedcoverage) A Collection Of Car Demotivational Posters (Uncoached) The 10x Bacon Turkey Melt from Subway Deserves Its Own Film (Regretfulmorning) The Booze Death Calculator (Bachelorguy) Katherine Heigel Gets Called Out On Her Comments About Hard Work (Moondogsports) Freak Eats Thousands Of Snakes (Nothingtoxic) The Legend Of Neil Episode 8: Neil Goes For Broke (Atomfilms) Frank Langella Joins Wall Street (Filmofilia)
Director: David MackenzieCast: Ashton Kutcher, Anne Heche, Margarita Levieva, Sonia Rockwell, Maria Conchita Alonso, Shane Brolly
The Jonas Brothers, Steve Harvey, Paul Giamatti and the return of Sgt. Slaughter. Not only are they all on TV tonight but they were also all in my dream last night. The recurring one where I lead a rag-tag football team to victory in the All-City Championship. Go Warthogs!CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMPNOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN AND PACIFIC!!!
THIS IS A WARNING. If you've come to this page with the intention of being aroused you should turn back now. You saw the word "NUDE" and thought everything was going to be hunky-dory, but you are sorely mistaken. There are no perky breasts or tight rumps to be found here, my friends. We're about to showcase a few outstanding nude scenes that won't leave you standing at attention. Sometimes they're for a laugh, sometimes they're for dramatic effect, but all of them are guaranteed to make you…uncomfortable. So here's your heads up, Screen Junkies. If you're watching any of these films below and gross, grey anatomy pops onto screen, don't say we didn't warn you. Kathy Bates in About Schmidt
Anticipation is in the air as nerd boners stiffen and engorge across the country. The eagerly-awaited District 9 opens THIS THURSDAY AT MIDNIGHT and that means that YOU can be one of the first to see it. According to early buzz and our review, the movie is stellar. You should definitely stay up late to catch what looks to be one of this summer's best. I'd stay up to watch it but I've got to deliver my papers in the morning. It's my sworn duty and I intend to honor it. (District 9) Focus your eyeballs on these morning links… Some info about The Thing prequel. (/Film) Paul Giamatti replaces Sean Penn in The Three Stooges. (Empire) Sum Dood cast as Green Hornet's Kato. (Cinematical) Salma Hayek totally unshaven. (Dread Central) Doug Liman is the new Hero of the Hudson. (Cinema Blend) Awesome scenes from G.I. Joe cartoon box set. (io9) So happy that Tuco made this list. (Pajiba)
I LOVE YOU, MAN – Behind the Vomit – Watch more Funny VideosEarlier this year, we put together a list of classic vomit scenes from film, prompted by the now infamous scene of Paul Rudd spackling his innards all over Jon Favreau. The clip's taken its place in the pantheon of puke of film, and we've now probably watched the scene over a dozen times, because it's just so damn convincing. And we were never quite sure just how the director John Hamburg pulled it off so convincingly… until now.The exclusive DVD clip – which appears on the upcoming I LOVE YOU, MAN DVD & Blu-Ray – above gives us an all-access glimpse behind the vomit. The amount of work that went into making this happen sort of blew our minds. It's like watching Peter Jackson constructing an FX shot from LORD OF THE RINGS, only instead of Elijah Wood waxing poetic about boysenberries with Sir Ian McKellan or whatever they talked about, you have ANCHORMAN's Brian Fantana projectile vomiting Campbell's Chunky Minestrone all over the director of the IRON MAN movies. I LOVE YOU, MAN starring Paul Rudd, Jason Segel and Rashida Jones arrives on DVD & Blu-Ray Tuesday, August 11th, 2009.
Above is the first official trailer for cursed-but-dogged director Terry Gilliam's THE IMAGINARIUM OF DOCTOR PARNASSUS. That poor ex-Python man just can't seem to make a movie without something going horribly wrong. Before it was natural disasters shutting down THE MAN WHO KILLED DON QUIXOTE (check out the documentary LOST IN LA MANCHA to see what I mean) and this time is was the tragic death of the lead actor (Heath Ledger). But like Dr. Parnassus, Gilliam wouldn't let mortality stop him, and not only kept Ledger in the film, but also added three others to round out the part of "Tony." You can see Ledger plus Johnny Depp, Jude Law, and Colin Farrell all in the clip above, which was said to have made Frank Caliendo's mimicry boner explode. Okay, Junkies, here are your weekend links… If GI Joe Worked In Your Office (Holytaco) Mafia Hitman Says No To Channing Tatum (Filmdrunk) Fat People Breaking Things With Their Fatness (Manofest) Pillow With A Light In It Doesn't Seem Conducive To Sleeping (Walyou) Nathan Fillion Endorses Ryan Reynolds As Green Lantern (Pajiba) The Truth Behind "Real Monsters" That Fooled The Internet (Cracked) 10 Batsh*t Crazy Paula Abdul Replacements (Coedmagazine) How To Start Your Own Religion (Mademan) Edith Labelle Leaves UFC In Suspicious Fashion (Cagepotato) 10 Realistic Wonder Woman Candidates (Unreality) Phobias For The 21st Century (Asylum) Lamont Jordan On Las Vegas Hitlist (Bustedcoverage) 10 Amazing Time Lapse Videos (Uncoached) Extreme Water Sliding Should Be A Sport (Regretfulmorning) Chipotle-Flavored Beer? (Bachelorguy) Jessica Simpson Is In Full Meltdown Mode (Moondogsports) Old Man Gets Tazered At The Ball Game (Nothingtoxic) A Tribute To The 80s In Memory Of John Hughes (Atomfilms) Meryl Streep, Alec Baldwin, And Steve Martin In Romcom Together (Filmofilia)
Death from Above…With Dildos – Watch more Funny VideosIn this new clip from THE GOODS: LIVE HARD, SELL HARD, car salesman extraordinaire Don Ready (Jeremy Piven) recounts the accidental death of his best friend McDermott to his lady friend, Ivy Selleck (Jordana Spiro). Throw in the fact that McDermott is played by Will Ferrell, and that his death involves skydiving and a backpack full of dildos, anal beads and lube, and you've got comedy. My idea of comedy usually only gets as far as lube (and a mirror), so this is pretty advanced stuff in my book.THE GOODS: LIVE HARD, SELL HARD opens Friday, August 14th.
Terrorism, theft, abominations of nature, and old people. This weekend's TV preview asks, Who would you rather go on a romantic ski trip with? Giant spiders or Joan Rivers??CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMPNOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN AND PACIFIC!!!
By Seymour Hersh, Investigative Journalist
The director responsible for a string of classics passed away yesterday. John Hughes reportedly suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting family in Manhattan. He was 59. Ferris Bueller's Day Off, The Breakfast Club, and Sixteen Candles (amongst others) will always be held in high regard around here. Screen Junkies would like to pass on our condolescences to the family and friends of Mr. Hughes. (AP)Don't you forget about these morning links…Where the Where The Wild Things Are second trailer is. (First Showing)Bryan Singer reteams with Syfy. (Latino Review)Fingers crossed! Louis C.K. may have a new show. (Variety)Galifianakis not too eager about Hangover 2. (IGN)Dethklok coming to a city near you. (TV Squad)
ZOMBIELAND Red Band Trailer – Watch more Movie Trailers After Shaun of the Dead, the idea of making a good zombie comedy must seem daunting to any sane person. And while the green band trailer for Zombieland didn't make anyone immediately name it the successor to Shaun, the newly released red band trailer embraces the odd-couple pairing of Jesse Eisenberg and Woody Harrelson and the gratuitous zombie violence… all of which makes this trailer a fun watch. Hopefully, the movie will be as awesome without getting tired of killing the undead.While you're thinking about just how many ways there really are to kill a zombie, check out these links for inspiration: Jeri Lee Actin' All Sexy (Gorillamask) A Flowchart To Determine If You're Going To Have Sex On A Date (Holytaco) Leo Dicaprio and Ridley Scott Have Eyes On Brave New World (Filmdrunk) 40 Sexy Girls Dressed As GI Joe Babes (Manofest) Microsoft Makes New Zune… But Why? (Walyou) The At The Movies Replacements Got Fired, Thank God (Pajiba) 6 Places You Should Never Twitter From (Cracked) The 11 Most Awesomely-Sorry Sly Stallone Soundtrack Songs (Coedmagazine) Megan Fox Talks About Angelina Jolie Again (Celebjihad) Most Wanted Chicks Of August (Mademan) Andrei Arlovsky Played Russian Roulette A Couple Times (Cagepotato) 17 Actors Who Played Themselves In Movies (Unreality) When Did The Kool-aid Man Start Wearing Pants? (Asylum) Cowboys' Stadium Bathroom And Toilets Boring (Bustedcoverage) Awesome "Before They Were Rockstars" High School Photos (Uncoached) The Most Awkward Article To Write A Blurb About (Regretfulmorning) You Can Make A Cocktail With Jager??? (Bachelorguy) Non-BCS Programs Need To Stop Whining (Moondogsports) Human Testing (Elevator)
Men in masks. Men in drag. Masked men in drag-races. Tonight's TV preview goes full circle and provides some lovely ladies along the way.CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN AND PACIFIC!!!
Tucker Max. Love him or hate him – and most people seem to fall into one of those two camps – you can’t deny the guy has exploited the internet…
Snuggie, everyone's favorite backward bathrobe is at it again. Not only did they invade our summer movies but now they've literally gone to the dogs. They've got some geniuses working over in the Snuggie camp. The pet accessories industry already rakes in 97 kajillion dollars per year. And now a sweet slice of that pie is going to Snuggie. I'm definitely going to invest. Ticker symbol: SNUG. Snuggie for Dogs – As Seen on TV Network – Watch more Funny Videos Warm your pups with these morning links… MTV 2009 VMA Best Breakthrough Videos. (The Playlist) Zombieland red band trailer. (Latino Review) Bill and Sookie are engaged. (NY Mag) James McTeigue might know something about a Superman reboot. (/Film) Ben and Ben no longer At The Movies. (Cinematical)
Girl Gets Answer Very Wrong – Watch more Funny Videos Apparently the clip is from a Kiwi game show called "W3" – presumably from the early '80s based on hair dating technology – and features a young female contestant nonchalantly giving an answer that you might only expect from your well-meaning but racially insensitive relative who fought in WW2. You have to commend young Jerry. Like a young, Asian Martin Luther King of Oceanic televised game shows, he gives nary a flinch while following up with the correct answer. Still, casual racism is hysterical, especially for white folks who feel inferior Asians, who, as whole, are omniscient. Increase your knowledge to sub-Asian levels (unless you are already Asian in which case, you have already read all of these in five languages) with these links: Actors Who Should Play Nascar Drivers (Allleftturns) Susan Weyland Wears A Lot Of Latex (Gorillamask) Bad News Crossword Puzzles (Holytaco) Have You Seen The Cast For Machete? (Filmdrunk) Keep MacGyver Away From Your Children (Manofest) Beer Glasses Made From Beer Bottles… Very Green (Walyou) The Time Traveler's Wife Now Changed To Be Happy (Pajiba) The Evolution Of The Internet Troll (Cracked) 10 Qualities Of A Great Drinking Buddy (Coedmagazine) Michael Douglas' Kid Is A Nerdy Drug Dealer (Celebjihad) Buy Yourself A Man-Cave (Mademan) World's Strongest Man To Fight MMA (Cagepotato) Hello Kitty Ruins Everything You Love In One Gallery (Unreality) What Songs Should Play At A Cougar Ball? (Asylum) Tennessee Vols Pose Shirtless With Lamborghini? (Bustedcoverage) 15 Animals That Got The Crap-End Of The Evolution Stick (Uncoached) Porn-Watching Habits Summarized In A Timeline (Regretfulmorning) The Steroid List Does Not Matter (Bachelorguy) Jennifer Anniston Is Lonely (Moondogsports) Redneck Boxing Match Ends Real Quick-Like (Nothingtoxic) New Sherlock Holmes Poster Showing Off Bad Guy (Filmofilia)