"Yo Patrick Swayze, I'm really happy for you and I'ma let you finish making this nice ashtray or whatever… but Bill Cosby's Ghost Dad was one of the best movies of all time. ONE. OF. THE. BEST. MOVIES. OF. ALL. TIME!" - Kanye West Here now… are the weekend's Top Kanye-Free Links: Flowchart To Determine If You Should Call 911 (HolyTaco)The Art Of Dude Landing (FilmDrunk)30 Amazing Sand Sculptures From Around The World (SuperTremendous)Pajiba's Fall Movie Preview (Pajiba)Keeley Hazell's Breasts In Various Swimsuits (CelebJihad)Bizarre Gallery Of Super Mario Bros. Fan Art (Unreality)Handwriting Can Give You Away As A Liar (Asylum)2009 Make 'Em Piss Blood Challenge (BustedCoverage)Tribute To The Camel Toe (RegretfulMorning)TPS NFL Weekly Locks: Week 2 (TotalProSports)When A Girl Wants You To Love Her (MadeMan)Why Your Driver Will Lose: Ryan Newman (AllLeftTurns)Robber Shoots Woman Point Blank In The Face (NothingToxic)Obama Undercover With A Hat On (Atom)
What to watch this weekend? The 61st I Couldn't Care Less Awards or a direct-to-DVD sequel to Waiting? Maybe I'll do the unthinkable and just read a book. CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN & PACIFIC!!!
A few months back we told you about the upcoming Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters project that Gary Sanchez Productions had picked up from Dead Snow director Tommy Wirkola. Now Sanchez honcho Adam McKay spills a little bit about where the production is at. No casting has been announced (though he mentions Will Ferrell will sit this one out) but it does seem the film will be an effects-driven, monster slaying good time. Think of it like MiB meets Shrek. Random sidenote, Susan Boyle would be PERFECT for a live-action Shrek. (MTV) Morning links… Spike Lee and Robert Deniro venture into Alphabet City. (Latino Review) X-Men: First Class ready to shoot in 2010. (Superhero Hype) Bill Hader aggrandizes Greg Mottola's Paul. (Cinema Blend) It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia Live! (Vulture) Seacrest almost got the happy knife. (WENN) The Five Best Slow Claps Of All Time (Pajiba)
It's a known fact that President Obama is a bit of a sci-fi nerd, and any doubt was obliterated this week when he jousted with a lightsaber on the White House lawn during an announcement for Chicago's 2016 Olympics bid. The story blew up so big, even the guy picking his nose in the background of the photo became a bit of a celebrity on Digg (ironic, considering he was only digging himself).
I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell Red Band – Watch more Movie Trailers Yep… uhhhh… The title of the post pretty much sums up what you get with the trailer. If you're interested in just how this film came to fruition (i.e. you're more of an ass man), you check out our in depth interview with Tucker Max and co-writer Nils Parker). Otherwise, subtly turn your monitor toward a corner, check there are no mirrors, and laugh/fap away. Less talky, more linky: 5 Things It's Always Sunny Should Sell In Their Store (HolyTaco) David Lynch's Art Show Sounds Awesome (FilmDrunk) Ligers Really Do Exist (SuperTremendous) 5 Best Slow Claps Of All Time (Pajiba) Olivia Wilde Gettin' Wild In GQ Magazine (CelebJihad) Possibly The Greatest Megan Fox Interview Ever (Unreality) Heeb Best Of 5769: Television (Heeb) Panamanian Kids Beat Gollum With Rocks (Asylum) Tim Tebow Gets Carved Into A Tree (BustedCoverage) 7 Reasons Glenn Beck Would Have Rape/Murdered (RegretfulMorning) Charles Rogers Charged With PUI? (TotalProSports) What NOT To Say To A Cop (MadeMan) Menard Takes Flopper Lead (AllLeftTurns)
Network: ABC FamilyCast: Jacob Zachar, Jake McDorman, Spencer GrammerSynopsis: A Freshman arrives at his sisters college (much to her dismay). He decides to pledge a fraternity on campus. After catching his sister's boyfriend with another girl, he ends up at his rival fraternity trying to go from geek to Greek and grow up in the process.
NBC unveils its new Comedy Thursday, Survivor sends its castaways to certain death, your grandma gets some action, and Danny Devito is on the loose again. In other words, goodbye Summer. CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN & PACIFIC!!!
If there's one thing Hollywood loves to do, it's run an idea into the ground. And when it comes to squeezing every last dime out of a concept, sequels are the studios' weapon of choice. But what happens when your film's main characters are dead, or your actors refuse to return for part two? A prequel. That’s what happens. From X-Men Origins to Van Wilder: Freshman Year, Hollywood has proven that all you need for a prequel is a loose back story, an established title, and a willingness to crap all over the memory of the original movie. On that note, here are seven awful prequels that are currently in production (in our minds). Shawshank Origins: Brooks Haven’t you always wondered about the mysterious origins of Brooks Hatlen, the librarian and resident "bird man" of Shawshank? No? Well screw you. That's what you're getting.
MTV has announced they are developing a spin-off to one of our favorite cult shows, Greg the Bunny. The new series, Warren the Ape, focuses on Greg's puppet counterpart Warren T. Ape DeMontague as he attempts to pick up the tattered shreds of his acting career. Failing to win any roles, DeMontague agrees to appear on a reality show as a last ditch effort. He's just like Trishelle. Both will do anything for attention and neither mind having fists stuffed up their butts. (THR) These morning links have been translated from Puppish to English… Nicolas Cage suddenly cares about character in his portrayals. (Cinema Blend)Scarlett Johansson needs a date for the Iron Man 2 premiere. (Superhero Hype)Red band I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell trailer. (Trailer Addict)Mark Millar teases Kick Ass 2. (/Film)Josh Olsen and Harlan Ellison will not read your f***ing script. (Cinematical)Jay Chandrasekhar holds a Shotgun Wedding. (Pajiba)Ray Wise is joining Dollhouse. (TV Squad)
Some clever fellow by the name of 'whoiseyevan' created this homage to the very 1950s pulp adventure flicks to which the Indiana Jones films paid homage as well. It's like Indiana Jones and the Search for Some Crazy Ass Meta Sh*t. The mash-up pulls from so many sources we can't list them, and features a pre-militant, rifle-carrying Charlton Heston as Dr. Jones, and a bevy of '50s film stars… all coming together for some uncannily similar action to Spielberg & Lucas's action hero. Impressive stuff. [via BoingBoing] No time for love, Dr. Jones? Make time for these links at least: Does Kanye Have Asperger's Syndrome? (HolyTaco) Forgotten Classics: Swayze Edition (FilmDrunk) 10 Funniest Fat Guys Of All Time (SuperTremendous) New Trailer For 'Paranormal Activity' Looks Freaky (Pajiba) Obama Calls Kanye West The N-Word (CelebJihad) Giant Gallery Of Gorgeous Girl Gamer Tattoos (Unreality) Dungeons and Dragons Soda Slays Nerd Thirst (Asylum) Missouri Hooters Bikini Car Wash: The Final Hosing (BustedCoverage) Pick Up Lines From The 80s (RegretfulMorning) Andrew Quarless Has College Football's Worst Tattoo (TotalProSports) The 10 Commandments Of Online Gaming (MadeMan) Why Your Driver Will Lose: Carl Edwards (AllLeftTurns) The New Kid Has A Bad First Day On The Bus (NothingToxic) Kanye West Apology Generator (Atom)
Bikinis, babes, beaches, explosions, and multiple partners. Tonight's TV Preview is like Girls Gone Wild as directed by Michael Bay. CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN & PACIFIC!!!
Network: NBCCast: Joel McHale, Chevy Chase, Gillian Jacobs, Danny PudiProducers: Dan HarmonSynopsis: Focuses on a band of misfits, at the center of which is a fast-talkin' lawyer whose degree has been revoked, who form a study group and end up learning a lot more about themselves than they do about their course work.
If you're into Movie and TV arcana as much as we are, you know there's only one place to find the weirdest, geekiest, most fantastically obscure memorabilia collecting dust in someone's closet. eBay: the auction house for the modern fanboy. We at Screen Junkies decided to investigate some of the cooler/weirder/geekier finds currently available for purchase on the site (at least at the time of this post), and are showing them off to you, the fans. Consider us your new secret shoppers.
Drugs Are Fun PSA – Watch more Movie Trailers In the above viral promo for Black Dynamite, starring Michael Jai White, the titular badass is on a mission to fight smack in the orphanage. He pays a visit to the front stoop of Ding Dong Roar (a disturbing '70s "Sesame Street"/"Zoobilee Zoo" hybrid) to let us know that drugs aren't as fun as they look. But judging by the catchy song, hypercolors and characters like Funky Feline and Little Strange Alien Child, drugs appear to be way f**king fun. Why Tom Sizemore isn't a regular on "Ding Dong Roar" is beyond us. Black Dynamite opens October 16th, 2009. Be sure to visit the official site of Black Dynamite's crusade: Fight Smack in the Orphanage. You can help the children and sh*t.
Now, before you unsheath your lightsabers to gouge your eyes out, know this: the photograph laying atop the mattress is not actually of Yoda or his Irish cousin Seamus O'Dagobah (could have fooled me). Nay, it's that of Yaddle, a female counterpart of Yoda's who is also part of the Jedi Council. So, your childhood hero is not about to be violated in effigy. Just one of George Lucas's afterthoughts crammed into The Phantom Menace. So use the Force, pal. Use as much Force as you want. Those Fleshlights are…ahem… supposed to be durable. [Source: PictureIsUnrelated.com]Here are today's top links: How To Convince Your Girlfriend To Like Football (HolyTaco)Christopher Lloyd Is Doing Great. Not. (FilmDrunk)50 Amazing Pieces Of Food Art (SuperTremendous)Colin Firth Is Creepy. Gay. Pretty. (Pajiba)Lady Gaga Distracts You From Her Penis (CelebJihad)South Park Kids Come To Life (Unreality)Jeff Ross's Best Friars Roast Zingers (Heeb)Finally You Can Measure The Intensity Of Your Farts (Asylum)NSFW Places To Display Your Patriots Super Bowl Ring (BustedCoverage)A Monkey Who Likes To Grab Boobs (RegretfulMorning)Federer Next Perpetrator Of Tennis Umpire Bashing (TotalProSports)The Hottest NFL Wives And Gfs (MadeMan)Why YOUR Driver Will Lose The Chase (AllLeftTurns)
Network: CWCast: Nina Dobrev, Paul Wesley, Ian Somerhalder Producers: Kevin WilliamsonSynopsis: Two vampire brothers – one good, one evil – are at war for Elena's soul and for the souls of her friends, family and all the residents of the small town of Mystic Falls, Virginia.
Comedy Central dresses down Kanye, Lil Wayne makes zero sense, Shaq takes on an Olympic champ, and Tom Arnold makes a sex tape. We want to see tonight's programming far more than we do a Tom Arnold sex tape. CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN & PACIFIC
We here at Screen Junkies are aaaalllll about Gossip Girl. Big time. Like, completely into it.
Jay Leno moves to the 10PM slot.
Kanye's VMA outburst rules the headlines again this morning as the rapper apologized on last night's premiere of The Jay Leno Show. To his credit, West faced the music and didn't cancel his scheduled appearance. Though that may be due to the fact that he was on to perform with Jay-Z and to back out would have upset his camp. West did seem sincere and got emotional when Leno shamed him by asking what his deceased mother would think of his behavior. And then Kevin Eubanks just chuckled out of the blue. That guy laughs at the most innappropriate moments. He's like Dr. Hibbard with a guitar.We apologize in advance for these morning links…Beyonce visits Zoobilee Zoo. (TV Squad)Watch the pilot episode of HBO's Bored To Death. (/Film)Basterd takes over for Nic Cage. (Superhero Hype)Comedian joins Red Dawn. (First Showing)Toy Story 3 teaser poster is sparse. (Latino Review)
We're winded by the news that Patrick Swayze has lost his battle with cancer after several ups and downs. The Point Break, Ghost, Dirty Dancing, and Roadhouse star was 57. Our condolences to Mr. Swayze's family and fans.I've lazily photoshopped that "one for the homies" graphic a lot in the past six months. It… it never gets any easier.
MTV wrapped up the 2009 Video Music Awards last night with the trailer premiere for Michael Jackson's This Is It; the documentary that captures rehearsal footage from the deceased singer's would-be epic concert. The show seemed like it would be spectacular and it's a true shame that Jackson didn't get to share his hard work and vision with fans. Though the film is being criticized by some as a hastily-cobbled cash grab, its being heralded by others as a tribute to a peerless legend. It will only play in theaters for two weeks but Joe Jackson would like you to know that he'll be selling butt-cam bootlegs the day after opening night.Michael would have wanted it that way.These links are a great adventure in their own right… Gary Busey Photoshop Contest Is Creepy (HolyTaco) Transformers Crew Hates Megan Fox (FilmDrunk) 7 Greatest David Hasselhoff Music Videos Of All Time (SuperTremendous) The Muppets Might Be Sock Puppets In Their Next Adventure (Pajiba) Jessica Simpson Looks Broken (CelebJihad) 10 Matrix Mashups That Are Sure To Entertain (Unreality) 5 Unlikely Reasons For Riots (Asylum) Ginger Leaves Miss. State Game With Penis On His Face (BustedCoverage) Spot A D-Bag By The Tilt In His Hat (RegreftulMorning) Gator's Jerseys Spell Out A Big Fight (TotalProSports) Become A Brocialite For Fun And Profit (MadeMan) Numbers Say Cup Is Stewart's To Lose (AllLeftTurns) Epic Fire Breathing Ends In Epic Face Burns (NothingToxic) Todd Glass Finds Out What's So Funny (Atom)
Ah, yes. The "Customers Who Bought This Item Also Bought…" function of an online store. It's a pretty darn incredible invention that works on multiple levels. On the one hand, stores like Amazon.com use it to get you to spend way more than you should. On the other hand, sometimes the "Also Bought…" function can be a very telling market research tool. Here are some TV on DVD box sets with overly truthful suggestions…
Tonight's TV Preview features the return of Leno AND a Kanye West temper tantrum. CAUTION: You should only watch if you have a desire to punch something. CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN AND PACIFIC!!!
Last night at the MTV 2009 VMAs, in a not-staged move, Kanye West made an unplanned and definitely not-staged intrusion during Taylor Swift's acceptance speech for Best Female Video. During the stunt, which was not staged in order to gain publicity, West commented that Beyonce deserved the award because her video was one of the greatest ever made (she later went on to win Best Video). Not only did his not-staged stunt embarass him (nice hair by the way, it looks like an ant farm),Swift, and Beyonce, but also Michael Jackson, who's legend the show was dedicated to. West has since apologized on his official blog stating, "I'M VERY SORRY FOR STEALING TAYLOR'S MOMENT. HEY, THE CAPS LOCK SEEMS TO BE STUCK ON THIS THING. I'D BETTER TAKE IT IN TO THE GENIUS BAR. THEY SHOULD RENAME THAT PLACE THE 'ME' BAR. BRING ME CHICKEN NUGGIES." But that's live not-staged television, folks. A non-staged stunt that isn't staged can happen at anytime, go viral, grab attention, and in doing so, earn a ton of internet ad dollars. On an unrelated note, be sure to check out the new season of It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia. It premieres Thursday, September 17th at 10. Only on FX. (Reuters) MTV Shows New trailer for Michael Jackson's This Is It. (Empire) Update on Jason Segal's cost-effective Muppet movie (Latino Review) LOST Season 6. The gang's all here. (Doc Arzt) Roger Corman honored by the Academy. (Dread Central) Bruce Campbell to steal more than one scene in Spiderman 4. (Cinema Blend)
"I picked the wrong time to blast C+C Music Factory, didn't I?" Above is our first attempt at a new weekly post called "Photobomb Fridays," in which we dream up what might happen if a shot from a famous film were ruined by… anything. This week's entry the scene from American History X in which Ed Norton's character, the neo-Nazi White supremacist "Derek Vinyard," has just killed a man by stomping his face on a curb. You can watch the full scene here. If you have any interest in submitting your photobomb creations to Screen Junkies, please contact us via feedback_at_screenjunkies.com. Here are this weekend's top links: Graphs For The Weekend (HolyTaco) Brett Ratner Lifetime Achievement Montage (FilmDrunk) 10 Actors Originally Considered For Famous Movie Roles (SuperTremendous) 20 Most Boring Films Of All Time (Pajiba) Chris Brown Starts His Community Service (CelebJihad) 15 Sexiest Ghostbusters Babe Pictures (Unreality) Superhero Lingerie Is Super Hot (Asylum) Justin Gage Will Not Give You His Football, Fatboy (BustedCoverage) A Video Compilation Of Epic Fails (RegretfulMorning) NFL Weekly Locks: Week 1 (TotalProSports) Get A Noble Title And Be A Royal Pimp (MadeMan) Chevy Rock & Roll 400 Race Time (AllLeftTurns) Bloody Fight In Paris Subway Station (NothingToxic) Like Toy Story, But With Boobs And Booze (Atom)
Tonight's TV Preview says goodbye to King of the Hill and hello to gangsters, monsters, and naked criminals. CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN & PACIFIC!!!
Editor's Note: The real Sylvester Stallone did not write this. By Sylvester Stallone Yo, Internet.
Director: TBDCast: Sylvester StalloneSynopsis: Rambo fights a werewolf or some sh*t. More TBD.
Awesome news out of Hollywood this morning. The Coen Brothers and their The Big Lebowski star, Jeff Bridges are reteaming to bring True Grit back to the screen. Bridges will be stepping into the role of Rooster Cogburn, originally played by John Wayne. Cogburn, a U.S. Marshall, will be tracking the killer of a 14-year old girl's father because that kind of aggression won't stand, man. Also rejoining the Coens is producer Scott Rudin, who previously worked with the siblings on No Country For Old Men. I can't wait to see them create another moody western and am excited to see how the spectacular Bridges handles this role. I'm literally quaking as if I'm having anime-induced seizure. (First Showing) These links will really tie your morning together… Where The Wild Things Are character posters. (IMP Awards)Stars return for Hancock 2, Earth yawns collectively. (Empire)Timothy Dalton joins Toy Story 3 to play Pants… Pricklepants. (Latino News)Werewolf: The Series totally c-blocked. (Dread Central)Browncoats unite! Firefly getting ripped off. (Pajiba)Rainn Wilson to don tights and wield a wrench. (Superhero Hype)