Ron Perlman's face is a photo-cropper's worst nightmare.When it was first reported that Mickey Rourke was joining Marcus Nispel's Conan remake, I was skeptical. The project just seemed to be too much in the B movie realm for Rourke. Also, it must be impossible to insure your film when you have Mickey Rourke and swords on set. But then I just figured that it was a cocaine-based decision and the money was too good to pass up. Sorry Eric Roberts, but Mickey Rourke has a rubber cement habit to support.Since that report, Rourke has dropped out in favor of Gods of War. Hellboy and Season of the Witch star Ron Perlman has stepped in to play Corin in his stead and it seems like a much better fit. Also note that Rachel Nichols and Said Taghmaoui (both of GI Joe) are rounding out the cast. Unless false reports pop up saying that Sir Richard Attenborough is circling the project, we can assume that the film is cast and the universe is balanced once again. (Vulture)
From its earliest days, "South Park" has been at its best when it is mocking the hypocrisy and stupidity of people and their foibles, and nowhere is this more evident than in the many episodes where it has forayed into political parody. Sometimes the episode has been merely subtly political, whereas others, such as the episode about the conclusion of the 2008 presidential race, have been overtly so. Regardless of the context, you can usually count on "South Park" to deliver an entertaining and insightful ride where not a single soul is left blameless and everybody ends up with egg on their face, be they the President of the United States or Osama bin Laden. The season premiere of "South Park" this Wednesday features a bit of a parody on the recent Blackwater scandal, and so in honor of that, Screen Junkies presents…
Peter Graves has sailed to that big Turkish prison in the sky.The veteran television and film star has passed away at the age of 83. Fans will recognize Graves for his various roles in over 70 films and television projects. Following a career in radio, Graves moved to Hollywood and eventually landed the role of Jim Phelps in Mission: Impossible. More recently, Graves won an Emmy as the host of Biography.Though Graves left his biggest impression on the world for his memorable role in Airplane! As Captain Oveur he became a comedy hero, with his untoward questions for a young passenger. Peter Graves will be truly missed and his death serves as a reminder that Leslie Nielsen is not imperishable. When that old fart goes, I will be inconsolable.
Sons of Tucson — Premieres Sunday Mar. 14 at 9:30/8:30 C on FOX – Watch more Funny Videos Check out this featurette of the new FOX comedy Sons of Tucson. Reese from Malcolm in the Middle is producing, so there's a good chance it could be twisted fun. What's that? You want to know what it's about? Well allllright! In the tradition of Malcolm in the Middle, Sons of Tucson is a family comedy about three brothers who hire a charming, wayward schemer to stand in as their father when their real one goes to prison. What begins as a simple business relationship evolves into a totally f'ed up family situation. The three brothers find their dad-for-hire working at the local sporting goods store. Ron, who's living out of his car like a man's man, is forced to dig into a vast bag of skeevy tricks as he steps into the role of patriarch to the boys of the Gunderson family. Sons of Tucson premieres Tonight @ 9:30/8:30C on FOX.
Opening night of the South by Southwest film festival featured a preview of footage from Predators. Austin local Robert Rodriguez brought a teaser trailer and clip and spoke to the audience about the upcoming sequel. More from him and director Nimrod Antal later, but first some thoughts on the footage. The teaser trailer, which Rodriguez said was likely to release with Repo Men, got the tone of the original Arnold movie right. It’s all shots of the human characters getting stalked. The camera pushes in on their faces as they turn around to face their unseen (for now) attacker. There are a few hints of familiar creature features, and a brief money shot, but it’s all buildup. Check out the teaser and more after the jump.
Burned.Here are your weekend links.10 Most Compelling Interracial Romances (Moviefone)Porn May Be Good for Society (Asylum)A Dramatic Reading of Lady Gaga's 'Telephone' (PopEater)25 A-Peeling Bananas (HolyTaco)Four Minutes of 'Iron Man 2' (FilmDrunk)Life Size Muppets are Terrifying (Unreality)This is One Bad Bruin (TotalProSports)Best Pissed-Off Police Chiefs (Maxim)10 Very Costly Mistakes (Smosh)Lindsay Lohan Suing Pedigree Over Dog Food Ad (CelebJihad)Depressing Photo of the Day: Jens Pulver (CagePotato)Robert Pattinson Career Assessment (Pajiba)Maganzo! (Atom)Top 100 Jobs in America (MadeMan)Everyone Hates Brad Keselowski (AllLeftTurns)
Tom Hanks minus a soul. Robert Zemeckis' obsession with motion capture has reached its glorious end! At least as far as Disney is concerned. After Zemeckis is finished with his film Mars Needs Moms (it's like he was asking for it), ImageMovers Digital will close in 2011. Walt Disney Studio president Alan Bergman says:Bob and the entire IMD team successfully built a state of the art studio and produced an amazing film, A Christmas Carol, at a time when the dynamics of the industry are rapidly changing. But, given today’s economic realities, we need to find alternative ways to bring creative content to audiences and IMD no longer fits into our business model.a.k.a. your characters are creepin' kids out, Bob. I for one am extremely happy to hear this news. Why did the man who brought us Forrest Gump and Tales from the Crypt go apesh*t over sticking dots to professional actors and turning them into animated cyborgs? Never underestimate the importance of pupils on screen. They make us believe the characters have a conscience, even if it's Gary Busey up there. (Deadline)
A sexy fight, that is.We reported earlier that extremely attractive Asian actress Maggie Q would play the title character in the CW's Nikita. Today there's news that she'll have some company. Lyndsy Fonseca (Kick-Ass, Hot Tub Time Machine) has signed on to play a newly-recruited, younger Nikita tasked with bringing in Q's character after she goes rogue. Sounds a bit like a mix between The Fugitive and NBC's ill-fated Bionic Woman remake.Fonseca's character is described as an "attractive, young, white female with virtually no personal ties or paper trail." In other words, Charlie Sheen's dream woman. (The Futon Critic)
If Alan Rickman ever holds this guy's Bonnie Bedelia hostage, he'll be ready.
"We need to see BOTH hands, Favreau."Not content with pissing off only black people, Couple's Retreat has sparked a new controversy. A former model is suing NBC Universal for $10 million after discovering her photo was used without permission as a "masturbatory prop" by Jon Favreau's character in Couple's Retreat. In the film, Irina Krupnik's decade-old bikini picture appears in a brochure that Favreau faps to while his wife is in the washroom. Krupnik had signed a general release at the time the picture was taken but never thought it would be used in a "quasi-pornographic context." We would post the picture for reference but the thought of Favreau…. jesus. Let's hope that piece of movie history doesn't end up at Planet Hollywood. I want to enjoy my blackened mahi mahi without that image in my head. (NY Post)
The new trailer for Shrek Forever After has hit, and it seems Dreamworks is kickin' it up a notch. Don't worry, it's still a kids' movie. I just try to find the most perverted part of everything and anything, and exploit it. I'm a big fan of the first Shrek, and even the second and third have their moments, but in Shrek Forever After I swear I can hear the staticy sound of crisp Benjamins passing over the mic as the cast counts their residuals. Far Away Land has grown tiresome, and the jokes about the fairy tale creatures we know and love fall flat. Will the Shrek series go out with a bang or a soft, wet fart? Find out May 21, 2010. Check out the donkey on cat action below.
This isn't a done deal yet but there's a lot of speculation that Steven Spielberg will choose Robopocalypse for his next directing gig. Based on an unpublished manuscript, Robopocalypse tells the story of humankind's struggle after the robot uprising. Cloverfield's Drew Goddard is on scripting duties. I'm picturing a mix of War of the Worlds and Schindler's List.Like I said, this is all industry insiders speculating so it could just as easily go away. What I do know is that you can't trust a machine. They could be anyone at anytime.(Deadline)
This little German girl can identify Han Solo using only her tongue. Somewhere in the universe Princess Leia is seething. Don't put these links in your mouth.iPod Nano 'Green Zone' Giveaway! (Moviefone)March Madness Bracketology (Asylum)Heidi Montag Fires Spencer, Hires Psychic (PopEater)Hot Gamer Chicks (HolyTaco)Corey Feldman Auditions for Cry Baby (FilmDrunk)100 Greatest Jewish Movie Moments (Heeb)15 Pokemon Brought to Life (Unreality)Mascot Eats ESPN's Michelle Beadle (TotalProSports)Hot Pics of Alice Eve (Maxim)7 Ways to Hook Up with a Leprechaun (Smosh)Emma Watson Shows Her Thighs to the Paparazzi (CelebJihad)Rachelle Leah to Return as Guest Octagon Girl (CagePotato)10 Most Anticipated Films of SXSW (Pajiba)Unicorns! (Atom)15 Things to Never Do with Your Girl (MadeMan)What Happens to All the Lug Nuts? (AllLeftTurns)7 of the Luckiest Men in America (RegretfulMorning)
Relativity Media has announced an upcoming project, currently titled Untitled Comedy, that is comprised of several short sketches directed by a wide array of directors. Those who have already completed their contributions for the expanding project are Peter Farrelly, Bob Odenkirk, Elizabeth Banks, Griffin Dunne, and well-known funnyman Brett Ratner, as well as additional directors who will be announced shortly.The project has also announced some big talent. Gerard Butler, Seann William Scott, Kate Winslet, Elizabeth Banks, Liev Schreiber, Chloe Moretz, Hugh Jackman, Naomi Watts, Patrick Warburton, Kieran Culkin, Johnny Knoxville are all on board so far. There are no details what the shorts are about but we do know they will be linked in some way. Producer Charles Wessler described the film:“We all sat down and came up with what we think is a hilarious through-line for the movie. Given the amount of pot I had smoked, at least I think it is hilarious.” Ah, a producer too stoned out of his gourd to clearly delineate what is and isn't hilarious. That explains the hiring of Brett Ratner. (CinemaBlend)
From left to right: Jason Bateman, Andy Garcia, Ryan Reynolds, Ben Affleck…Jason Bateman and Ryan Reynolds are stepping into each other's skin for the David Dobkin directed comedy Change Up. From THR:Written by "Hangover" scribes Jon Lucas and Scott Moore, "Change-Up" is the latest entry into Hollywood's long line of body-switching movies. This one is a male-centric take on the genre, centering on a responsible family man (Bateman) who switches bodies with his best friend, a lazy man-child (Reynolds).Sooooo it's like The Odd Couple if Felix and Oscar switched bodies? Genius! I bet Bateman's character will wake up in Reynolds's messy apartment and be like totally, "WTF?!" He can't possibly cook a sensible breakfast with only Captain Crunch and used condoms.David Dobkin directed Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson to comedic gold in Wedding Crashers, but that was a fairly unique concept, not a shriveled-up rehash from the 80s. They may as well also work a talking dog in there to really round it out. I'm sure Joan Cusack is available.
When it was first announced that Conan O'Brien would embark on a live tour as a means around NBC's cock-blockery, my first thought was "Awesome!" Then my second thought was, "Don't bring your guitar. Don't bring your guitar. Don't bring your guitar." Today the giant comedian wrote on his Twitter:“Hey Internet: I’m headed to your town on a half-assed comedy & music (GODDAMNIT-Ed.) tour. Go to http://TeamCoco.com for tix. I repeat: It’s half-assed.”We've got the full list of tour dates after the jump but I've got to say, I'm kind of disappointed. Tickets for the Radio City Music Hall dates cost between $44 and $84 BEFORE Ticketmaster rapes your wallet with hidden fees and bullsh*t additional charges. Conan's funny and all but if I want to see a Masturbating Bear, I can probably do so for free in the West Village. (Team Coco)FIND OUT WHEN CONAN'S COMING TO YOUR JERKWATER TOWN AFTER THE JUMP…
He's being discreet about it.Not the most surprising of news, but Christopher Walken is now dabbling in the severed hand business. In Martin McDonagh's play A Behanding in Spokane, Walken is currently playing a psychotic one-handed man in pursuit of the appendage he lost 47 years earlier. Of course, the lines of reality and fiction have blurred for the actor, and when he would normally shout for more cowbell, he's now shouting for more hands.Walken is hoping the production will gift him with hands that he can keep in a special "souvenir" room he has set up in his house/dungeon. Not one person has seen the inside of this room and lived to tell about it. It was once believed that Natalie Wood accidently stumbled into it while looking for the bathroom, but she never revealed her findings. We all know how Walken took care of that… (Vulture)
Leonardo Da Vinci the Italian painter, sculptor, architect, musician, scientist, mathematician, engineer, inventor, anatomist, geologist, botanist, and writer may be able to add another credit to his list of accolades — action hero. Due to the success of Sherlock Holmes, studios are buying up treatments that turn lieterary and historical figures into kick-butt do-gooders. Warner Bros has picked up a treatment called Leonardo da Vinci and the Soldiers of Forever, a re-imagining where Da Vinci is a member of a secret society who “falls headlong into a supernatural adventure that pits the man against Biblical demons in a story involving secret codes, lost civilizations, hidden fortresses and fallen angels.” Wow. And we all thought Kingdom of the Crystal Skull was retarded. Maybe this isn't a trend that we want to over-do. Kids are already bad at school and this will not help. But if we must continue down this path, can we please credit the man who did it first and did it best? Of course I'm talking about "Weird" Al Yankovic. The man is a visionary. (THR)
The new trailer for Robin Hood proves it's a tough business stealing from the rich and giving to the poor. Robin from da Hood, played with convincing mean-face by Russell Crowe, trots his way into Nottingham and says, "Nuh uh" when he witnesses how a despotic sheriff is treating his peeps. So he does what any other man in tights with a bow and arrow would do: he finds other men in tights with bows and arrows and forms a merry gang. Together they fight a smooth-headed Mark Strong, a formidable foe as Sir Godfrey, as Robin from Da Hood tries to get in Maid Marian's (Cate Blanchett's) panties. All of this is a lot more epic and romantic than I'm describing it, but you get the gist. Look folks, Ridley Scott directed the damn thing. You know what to expect. My words can't do sweeping wide-shots justice. Check out the new trailer after the jump. Robin Hood storms into theaters May 14, 2010.
Hilarious The Grudge Prank – Watch more Funny VideosThe last guy pranked is a punkass b*tch.Don't let these links getchya.Remembering Corey Haim (Moviefone)70 Awesome Chuck Norris Facts (Asylum)Oscar's Kanye-Woman Speaks Out (PopEater)25 Visual Puns (HolyTaco)The Big Lebowski Morality Continuum (FilmDrunk)Five Awesome Oscar GIFs (Unreality)Can You Resist the Gina Carano Lip-Bite? (TotalProSports)Girls in Tubs (Maxim)11 Signs You Had Too Much to Drink Last Night (Smosh)Corey Feldman Found Alive (CelebJihad)Tips for Mastering Your Ultimate Fighter Audition (CagePotato)5 Actors Who Need Themselves an Oscar (Pajiba)Straight Cop, Gay Cop (Atom)Own a Jetpack (MadeMan)LOL Race Pics (AllLeftTurns)
Jude Law gets his organ worked on. A red band trailer for Repo Men has been released, and for a movie centered around organ removal, it doesn't disappoint. You get Jude Law removing organs, Forest Whitaker removing organs, and a team of doctors… removing organs! The only person who isn't reaching into an orifice is Liev Schrieber, the reason being his hands are perpetually unsterile. How Naomi Watts stands it, I'll never know. Check out the entrails-filled red band trailer after jump. Disclaimer: it's bloody.
The adage 'time waits for no man…' was kicked in the teeth and taught to be less impatient with the news that Chuck Norris is celebrating his 70th birthday today. That's right. Seventy years and nine months ago today, the bearded sperm that would form Chuck Norris round-housed into an ovum and conceived the toughest man this world will ever know. Ryan, Oklahoma remains a crater to this day.In honor of the sacred day, his family plans to throw him a "know party" because you can't surprise Chuck Norris. If he were to throw it himself, it would circle the Earth and land at his heels. Happy Birthday, Chuck!
Timothy Olyphant loves himself some westerns. First he squared off with Ian McShane on the HBO drama Deadwood, and now he's back as gun-slinging U.S. Marshall Raylan Givens in the FX show Justified. Let it be known, his character only draws his weapon when he has to, and when he does, he shoots to kill, because, as he sees it, that's the purpose of a gun. That, and looking totally badass in front of your elementary school friends.I honestly can't see this show being unworthy of my time. It stars Timothy Olyphant and Walton Goggins from The Shield a.k.a. the best show ever, is adapted by Graham Yost, the creator of the stellar cancelled NBC show Boomtown, from an Elmore Leonard short story, and is on FX, quite possibly the most badass network on television. The only thing that would make FX more badass is if it were holding a gun. Get on that, Rupert Murdoch. Check out the behind the scenes featurettes after the jump. Justified premieres on FX next Tuesday, March 16 at 10PM ET/PT.
(Relax, it's apple juice.)The more slurry half of the Coreys has passed away. Corey Haim was found dead this morning after an apparent overdose of prescription drugs. TMZ reports that he collapsed in front of his mother just before 1 AM and was reported dead a little over an hour later after being rushed to the hospital.Haim rose to fame as a 1980's teen heartthob in such films as Silver Bullet, Lucas, The Lost Boys, License to Drive, and Dream a Little Dream. Problems with drug addiction led to a career spiral though he is said to have rehabilitated himself in 2004. He was seen most recently in A&E's The Two Coreys and Crank: High Voltage. He was 38. (TMZ)
Following in the footsteps of Brian Dennehy and Craig T. Nelson, Robert De Niro has signed on to play an iconic coach in the ESPN Films biopic Lombardi. Arguably the greatest coach in NFL history, Vince Lombardi led the Green Bay Packers to two Superbowl and five league championship wins. I should also mention dude could burp the entire alphabet… backwards. Doesn't sound too impressive to you, but in Wisconsin that is a godlike ability.The film, to be written by Eric Roth (Forrest Gump), will focus on the 8 years that Lombardi spent with the Packers, molding them into NFL champs. Very little time will be spent on his epic belching. (THR)
Nick Swardson Screen Junkies Shout Out – Watch more Funny VideosWe caught up with Nick Swardson on the set of his new Comedy Central sketch show. More on that in the future, but right now Nick gives us a creepy shout out.Here are today's links. 10 Most Ridiculously Mismatched Movie Couples (Moviefone)A Woman's Perspective on Cheating (Asylum)Heidi Montag Says No To Plastic (PopEater)25 Inappropriate Children's Books (HolyTaco)How To Write a Romantic Comedy (Uproxx)15 Best Pics of Christina Hendricks (Unreality) Capitals Alexander Shoutout Fail (TotalProSports)Women of Spring Training (Maxim)15 Fearless Streakers (Smosh)Ben Roethlisberger Claims He Was Sexually Assaulted (CelebJihad)Jim Miller Talks UFC 111 (CagePotato)Felicia Day to Fight Werewolves (Pajiba)Pregnant Hotties Do The Bump 'n Grind (Atom)Red Bull Art of the Can (MadeMan)New Gran Turismo 5 Demo (AllLeftTurns)7 Bad Phone Habits You Need to Stop (RegretfulMorning)
X-Men Origins: Wolverine's Sabretooth wants you guys to know that he'd really like to be in the sequel. At a press conference for Repo Men, Liev Schreiber told reporters that Hugh Jackman has told him about the script but he's not sure if he'll return (though he really wants you guys to know that he totally would if asked)."I just had dinner with [Hugh Jackman] last night and Hugh read the first draft of the script and I was really excited about it. It's still not clear whether or not Victor will be present in the Japan storyline. In the Japan storyline as I remember it from the Wolverine comics, Victor wasn't there. So I don't know, of course I've got my fingers crossed because I love the character so much, to have the chance to do it again would be a lot of fun, but I'm not sure."So, was Hugh Jackman trying to rub it in his face or what?HUGH: Oh, mate. The new Wolverine script is excellent. Too bad you won't be a part of it. Terrific stuff.LIEV: Oh man. That sucks. I guess I'll just have to stay home and bang Naomi Watts for four months.HUGH: Yeah, that's cool too. I s'pose. If you're into that sorta thing.(via io9)
Gerald McCullouch of CSI: Crime Scene Investigation was arrested for public urination last week in New York and has been court ordered to undergo counseling. He tells New York Daily News:"I'd had a little to drink. So, as I was coming down the West Side Highway, I asked my cab driver to pull over so I could relieve myself. Suddenly I was surrounded by three cop cars. I said, 'Officer, at least let me finish!' But I actually learned something from the hour-long quality-of-life counselling the judge sentenced me to. Education is better than a fine." When reached for comment CSI: Miami star David Caruso said, "When you're surrounded by three cop cars, you know…. *sunglasses*…. urine trouble." YYYYYEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! (IMDB)
Some might look at this new poster for The Losers and think, "Oh clever, they're assassins who just shot me and now they're standing over my body as my last breath of air escapes." I look at this poster and think, "Suck it." Zoe Saldana especially seems like she could use some servicing. Jeffrey Dean Morgan just looks gassy.The Losers centers around the members of an elite Special Forces unit sent to the Bolivian jungle on a search and destroy mission. They're gonna kick ass, take a few names, and steal the innocence of a few unlucky henchmen. Open wide, world. The Losers hits theaters April 23, 2010. (FilmSchoolRejects)
Lindsay Sloane was Maid of Honor at the wedding of Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddie Prinze Jr. QUITE the accomplishment I might say. She also made an appearance on Entourage, but nothing tops standing next to Gellar as she made the mistake of marrying Fred from The Scooby Doo Movie.A word from Lindsay: "I am so incredibly hot."Whoa, pump the brakes. Clearly you're more attractive than me, but Alice Eve makes everyone else look like Alexis Dziena. More definitely worthwhile pics of Lindsay after the jump.